Recently, I attended a visitation for a 36 year old woman who died unexpectedly last week. She was a wife and mother of two beautiful boys, whose lives are changed forever. I went through the line and as I got closer to the family, my heart was pounding as I frantically searched for words of comfort, knowing there were none. I just hugged everyone without saying a word. Looking around the room I could see how loved she had been by family, friends, and coworkers.

Today, I was thinking of my feeling of helplessness that there were no words of comfort for the family, and how that will continue for a very long time. As a grief counselor, I feel having supportive people is essential for surviving this loss. This is also the most challenging because the majority of my clients come to see me because family and friends feel they should be ‘over it” and carry on with their lives within six to eight weeks, leaving them feeling isolated and alone in their grief.

For the many who are supportive, I want to help keep your foot out of your mouth (I’ve done it many times too).

I have found some beautiful quotes on how to help a friend who is grieving and will post them periodically. I encourage feedback and also, if you have a favorite, please share.

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